1. Don’t begrudge spending money on your own comfort, health and quality of life. You deserve it! AND FOR THE OVER-60’S - The government’s annual fuel allowance of £200 is meant to be used for our warmth and comfort, and to ease the worry of the increased heating bill. The Winter Fuel Payments Help line is 0845 9 151515 If you are receiving a disability or income-related benefit, you may be able to claim a grant of up to £2,500 for insulation and heating improvements. Call Home Energy Efficiency Scheme 0800 952 0600. If you receive disability and income-related benefits you can claim Cold Weather Payments if the temperature falls below 00 C for 7 consecutive days. There is also the Staywarm scheme. For a fixed charge you can use as much gas or electricity as you need. 0800 1 694 694 Finally, if you are unable to pay your winter fuel bill, in the first instance contact your supplier explaining your problem and informing them that you are a pensioner. Good news worth remembering, is that electricity companies and British Gas have a policy of not disconnecting pensioners between 1 October and 31 March – so keep warm and don’t panic.

- - - - - . . . . AND DO YOU NEED REMINDING - DON’T WASTE YOUR MONEY AND HEALTH ON CIGARETTES. RESEARCHERS TELL US THAT THE AVERAGE BRITISH SMOKER WILL SPEND £91,832.43 ON CIGARETTES IN A LIFETIME. (Now, I’ve never smoked so I wonder what happened to my £91,OOO?)

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2. Keep your mind active, crosswords, sudoka, hobbies, etc. NEVER STOP LEARNING. If you have an interested mind, people are more likely to enjoy your company and be interested in you.

3. Keep your body active. As the saying goes, if you don’t use it, you’ll lose it Walk in the fresh air if possible. If you enjoy company while you are walking then join a rambling group. (Often ‘rambling clubs’ for the retired are more socially inclined ‘ambling clubs’). Gardening combines the benefits of fresh air, exercise and the results can give you immeasurable pleasure. Dancing; particularly formation or line dancing exercises the memory also. Swimming, is a particularly good exercise for all parts of the body with the added advantage that the water is supporting you and therefore there is no weight on the joints.

4. Feed your body with the correct foods. You wouldn’t expect your car to work efficiently if you fed it the incorrect fuel. So feed your body with nutritious foods that contain the necessary vitamins and minerals in order for it to return optimum performance. With winter approaching we need to build up our immune system, so in addition to a well balanced diet of fresh fruit, fresh vegetables and nourishing protein (laced with the benefits of virgin olive oil and garlic), we should add a few supplements to help us on our way. In addition to a good multi-vitamin tablet, you’ll probably benefit from extra Vitamin C, Echinacea, EPA fish oils, selenium, ginko biloba to aid circulation, particularly to the extremities, and glucosomine to help with those aching joints.

Don’t forget your flu jab and the jab against pneumonia for the over 70’s. There is also really excellent news on the common cold front. At long last there appears to be something that stops a cold developing. Vicks First Defence is a spray that you use at the first sign of a cold and it stops the cold virus in its tracks. This miracle goes on sale during October 05.

5 Socialise. Possibly I don’t have to remind you about this as the majority of retired folk I meet complain that they are busier now than ever they were, that there are not enough hours in the day, and they wonder how they ever found time to go to work. There are so many clubs and groups to join. To name a few popular ones, U3A (University of the Third Age) for both sexes and with interesting speakers, and offering numerous sub sections for specific group interests and hobbies, Women’s Institute, (has gained a new image after the film Calendar Girls), Townswomen’s Guild, Gardening Clubs, Art Clubs, etc., and many clubs aimed specifically at the retired.

If transport is a problem, remember most local authorities offer free or reduced bus fares for senior citizens and travel tokens for the disabled. There is a Senior Railcard for reduced train fares for the over 60’s. National Express have a Routesixty Scheme which enables over 60’s to travel nationwide very cheaply (Tel 08705 808080). Also, occasionally, National Express offer their ‘go anywhere for £5 scheme’.

If you have difficulty in getting around the town, then there is Shopmobility where you can hire mobility scooters (various models and sizes available) and electric and manual wheelchairs. Shopmobility is usually manned by helpers who will be only too pleased to instruct and allow you to practice before you are let loose on the town. Also there is the added advantage that there is usually a free car park attached to Shopmobility for clients’ convenience. If you have difficulty in using public transport, often local authorities provide a ‘dial-a-ride’ service from your home to the shopping centre.

Well, whatever you do – E N J O Y I T! We were always told that laughter is the best medicine and now we know it to be true – it raises the serotonin levels in the brain and gives you that ‘feel good’ factor.

Visit Mabels…Maintaining Bygone Times, containing numerous articles thoughtfully researched mainly for the older person. You may access these articles by visiting http://www.mabels.org.uk/ - You will learn about the best tips, latest news & advice to improve your health, fitness, finances & retirement as well as information on nostalgic topics, places to visit, leisure & lifestyle, mobility & helpful organisations to make the most out of life and much, much more to benefit "Your Quality of Life".

Do you love your family; does your family mean all the world to you? Are you constantly trying to figure out how to make your family tighter and more complete? You know there is a very good reason for this. If you look at the animal kingdom you will see that humans are so similar in that regard to our families. It appears that all animals including humans indeed have some innate characteristics and genetic coding, which makes this all possible. Family is a very important thing to all of us and it appears that there is very good reasons for this. Without a strong family structure and humans working together in societal groupings, we may never have been able to get to a point to bring our civilization to where it is today.

One interesting point in the need for family are comments coming from business titans, research scientists, prominent politicians, accomplished actors and successful athletes and that is as their careers and life wind down they are often asked; “Is there anything that they regret?” More often than not and I would wager to say 95% of the time they will say, “I wished I had spent more time with my family, that is what is really important to me now.” Some even go so far as to say; “If I had it all over to do again, I would have spent more time with my family, because that is something money cannot buy.”

So you see not only is it a genetically coded innate characteristic it is also a basic need of our own personal psyche for personal satisfaction. All these folks are trying to tell us something; I sincerely hope everyone is listening, because at the end of their lives they are warning us about how we should be living today. Family is everything, so think on this.

"Lance Winslow" - Online Think Tank forum board. If you have innovative thoughts and unique perspectives, come think with Lance; www.WorldThinkTank.net/wttbbs/

We can define proprioception (I know, it took me a few tries to get it right) as a person’s perception of stimuli relating to his or her own position, posture, equilibrium, or internal condition.

Proprioception came heavily into play for me at least twice in the last four weeks.

Once on a cold, rainy day in Illinois I had to step in a puddle as I was walking through a parking lot. As luck would have it, the pavement was broken and uneven at the exact spot where my foot fell, and I tumbled forward. A few days later, as I was descending a set of external stairs in the dark in Connecticut, my foot landed on the next to last step. It came down near the edge, and part of the edge had worn away. Again I tumbled forward.

Now, as they say, the rest of the story.

I am 60 years old. By all rights, at my age, I possibly should have hit the ground and broken a bone or two. What actually happened in Illinois was that I whipped my other leg forward, caught my balance, and kept on going. In Connecticut, I pushed off the stair with the ball of my foot, swung my other leg forward and jumped to the ground…and kept on going.

Actually, we all deal with proprioception several times a dwy. Every time we take a step, we fall forward, and proprioceptive awareness tells us at each moment of the movement where we are and what we need to do about it.

However, as we age, this awareness process begins to fail for various reasons, and this is one of the reasons older people tend to fall more often. Add to this the fact that bones begin to thin out and become more brittle and…Presto! Change-o! Life suddenly becomes a lot more challenging at best and downright dangerous at worst. In fact, to make matters worse, as we become consciously or unconsciously more aware of this change, we tend to alter our lifestyles in ways that cause us to lose even more of this faculty. The very act of protecting ourselves from the presumed pitfalls of old age causes us go get out less and do less, and this lack of physical activity contributes to the deterioration. As we become more uncertain of our ability to navigate and function or become more fearful of damage to ourselves, we tend to "hole up" within our homes, and, more sadly, within ourselves.

To digress for just a moment, as I am prone to do, I used to be the Business Manager for a county mental health facility in Florida. I have always been interested in geriatrics as I felt, and seemed to be learning, that many people suffer affects of ageing to a much greater degree than necessary and condemn themselves to the very conditions they fear. My frequent conversations with Diane, the head of our geriatric program, tended to confirm this. On more than one occasion, she looked sadly around the room at people unaware of their location or the date and time or unable to take part in the program’s activities, and tell me, "Most of these people should never have wound up here! They could have done things to prevent this from happening to them."

Over the years, I have come to agree with her…both from what I have learned, and from what I personally have experienced.

Without going into a lecture on anatomy and physiology, as we age, various components within the muscles of the body which constantly send data to the brain gradually begin to shut down or withdraw. Additionally, tissue which connects the muscles to the bone begins to thin out, lose flexibility, and also reduce the depth and condition of their links to the bone.

The simple solution to this is regular motion and load-bearing, or resistance exercises.

Not only do these types of exercise strenghthen the muscles (like what I needed in my jump), and encase and protect joints (like my knees when I hit the ground), they help reestablish the faculty of proprioception. First, the system itself gets a workout that helps keep it up to speed, repairing and rejuvenating the various transmitters that keep the brain informed. Second, the muscles dig their connectors into the bone to a greater depth, protect the joint more effectively, assist the bone in becoming less brittle and more substantial, provide power for sudden movements, and also aid in providing the brain with more data, so it can figure out where every part of the body is, and what to do about it.

By the way, exercises or exercise machines that require the body to stabilize itself, for example free weights as opposed to a static exercise machine, are much more effective in producing positive affects in this area.

As you have long suspected, a fit senior citizen (or young whipper-snapper, for that matter will be better able to enjoy life at any age, be less prone to injury, and will probably simply last longer than the unimproved model.

Yes, I do resistance exercises several times a week in addition to regular aerobic activities, and that is why I was able to come through both of those events I mentioned above, AND let my six-year-old granddaughter crawl all over me and engage in roughhouse play with her and the dog without any ill affects.

The author is retired from the Army after 21 years of service, has worked as an accountant, optical lab manager, restaurant manager, and instructor. He has been a member of Mensa for several years, and has written and published poetry, essays, and articles on various subjects for the last 40 years. He developed an interest in health and fitness in the ’70s after reading numerous books, including Dr. Kenneth Cooper’s "Aerobics". This has led him to continue his personal research into health and fitness for over 30 years, and to pursue course work on health and fitness. He now has an online health supplement store at http://eherbsstore.com

There are many advantages that a rolling walker can provide, including the freedom to keep you mobile. And with stylish colors and designs available, you can feel good shopping at the mall or strolling outdoors. If this is your first purchase of a walker, start by looking at brand models such as the Guardian Envoy 460 or the Nova Cruiser GetGo. These two walkers are reasonable priced and include many smart features. Read on for more information and comparisons of standard walkers versus rollators.

Who should consider a walker with wheels?

If you’re steady on your feet and still able to get around but have some trouble with balance then the answer is: you. Since many people have just one mobility walker: standard or rolling, consider whether or not the rollator will benefit your lifestyle. These mobility aids are work best for:

Flat surfaces
Living facilities
Strolling
Performing daily activities such as shopping

In addition, state of the art features and a handsome design make the wheeled walker a stylish piece of equipment. Typical features include: 4 wheels and hand brakes. Deluxe features include: padded seats and baskets. Top manufacturers such as Invacare, Nova and Guardian, typically allow you to customize your walker, adding on the accessories that you desire. Besides the accessories listed above you may also want to add on such extras as a: tray, cup holder, tote bag, travel bag or hanging walker bag.

For individual selection, there are also walkers designed with 3 wheels such as, Nova’s Traveler Rolling Walker. This mobility aid can be used on any terrain, is lightweight (only12 pounds), and is very easy to maneuver (It is recommended for those not requiring the extra stability of a 4 wheeled walker.)

Another choice, the Nova Cruiser II, is designed for first time walker users. Instead of 4 wheels it has two 5” front wheels and rubber tip rear legs. This feature helps prevent the walker from rolling away as well as providing more stability.

For heavy weight models that can handle 375 pounds and 600 pounds respectively, take a look at the Guardian Envoy 480 and the Nova Mighty Mac. The Mighty Mac features a 20” wide seat and is good for people between 5’5” to 6’1”.

For great value and quality the Guardian Envoy 460 is worth considering. With a 275 pound weight capacity and users height range from 5’5” to 6’1”, this is a sturdy yet lightweight aluminum framed walker on wheels. What’s nice about this piece of equipment is that it includes the padded seat and under seat basket for the price: often you pay more for these features. You can also choose your color - blue, green or red.

Another popular light weight choice is the Nova Cruiser GetGo. This walking aid weighs only 12 pounds and is suitable for users from 5’4” to 6’1”. What’s nice about this walker is that it has a gentle “feather touch” braking system. It is also easy to lift and perfect for strolling outdoors.

Rolling walker versus standard walker

There are many factors to consider when deciding on which style of walker to buy. What will Medicare pay for? What’s the lowest price? What features are necessary?

But essentially the needs and mobility level of the user is the first place to start. We’ve discussed rolling walkers but there are also good choices in standard walkers. Brands such as Invacare, Guardian, TFI Health Care and Carex are all popular manufacturers.

A typical standard walker features 4 legs with rubber feet. These mobility aids are generally lighter weight than rolling walkers, about 6 pounds on average. They also tend to cost less. And, many standard walkers fold easily, with some models folding flat for compact storage.

To accessorize, baskets can be added. You can also add 2 wheels to increase maneuverability and allow the walker to glide easily over rough terrain. Another item, the Walkerball Tennis Ball Glide, provides effortless, scuff free movement across the floor. These balls are designed to fit most standard walkers.

So you can see with quality choices in both types of walkers there are plenty of options to keep you mobile. For more information on http://www.wheelchair-ramps-and-mobility-aids.com

Nicole Martins is a contributing author and publisher to http://www.wheelchair-ramps-and-mobility-aids.com a comprehensive guide to the mobility products and assistive technologies, helping you to overcome disabilities and live a more active life.

Mobility scooters can mean freedom, but you when you need a scooter, it’s important to buy the right product for your needs. There are four basic styles of electric mobility scooters: travel, three wheel, four wheel and heavy duty. One of them is right for you.

Travel Scooters

Travel scooters are light and portable. They work well in tight spaces and are easy to transport. Most travel scooters disassemble easily into three or four pieces and will fit in almost any car. However, they don’t have much ground clearance and won’t handle bumps well. While travel scooters come in three and four wheel models, their main selling points are portability and low cost. Expect to pay $600 to $2,000 new.

Full Size Three and Four Wheel Scooters

Compared to a travel scooter, full sized scooters have more of everything: comfort, foot room and ground clearance. With only one front wheel, three wheeled scooters may offer the most foot and leg room of any scooter style. On the other hand, four wheeled models provide improved stability. Full sized scooters require a full sized vehicle, and they may be a little big for indoor use in some homes. Outdoor use, even on rough dirt roads should be good. These machines will probably require use of an electric wench or ramp to load into your vehicle. Expect to pay $700 to $3,000 for the scooter and $350 to $2,000 for a new ramp or wench.

Heavy Duty Scooters

While ordinary scooters top out at a 250 pounds weight limit, heavy duty models can handle passengers up to 500 pounds. Frames, seats and motors are all built to handle the increased demands. Prices for new heavy duty scooters start around $2,000 and go up to almost $4,000. Again, you’ll need a wench or ramp with one of these plus sized units.

If you want to maintain your freedom and independence, experts recommend you adapt early and adapt often. Don’t let anyone talk you into a scooter that won’t fit your home, your car or your lifestyle. Keep your battery topped up and get back out there!

About the Author

Rodney Robbins has a rare myopathy called Periodic Paralysis. On bad days, he uses a three wheeled travel scooter to protect his muscles from damaging exercise. Rodney suggests you visit http://www.spinlife.com or http://www.thescooterstore.com/ for great deals on mobility equipment.

Who Needs a Scooter?

Do you have trouble walking long distances? Joint pain, balance issues or muscle problems? If so, you might enjoy life more if you used a mobility scooter to assist you. On the other hand, you might hate the darned thing! Before you spend fistfuls of your own money, or fight with doctors and insurance about getting a reimbursement, consider a free test ride.

You Don’t Need to Buy to Try

You don’t need to call a salesman or some toll free number from TV. You don’t even need to do a Google search or check the Yellow Pages. Nope. Instead, the next time you are in a big department, hardware or grocery store, try one of their courtesy scooters. These full size, heavy duty scooters are usually kept up front by the grocery carts.

Don’t Feel Guilty About Your First Time

If this is your first time trying a scooter, you might feel a little guilty. What if someone comes along who needs it more than you do? So, only take a scooter if there are two or more available. That’s one for you, and one for the next guy.

Try it. Go slow. Watch out you don’t bump into things with that giant basket up front. Then see how you feel when you are done shopping. If you feel rested, or at least not as exhausted as you usually would after roaming around one of those giant stores, a scooter might be right for you. Try it a few more times, then decide if you might like to own a scooter, or if using the store machines is all you need. Your answer will make a huge difference in your physical and financial health, and you can get your answer for FREE.

About the Author Rodney Robbins has a rare muscle disorder called Periodic Paralysis. He frequently uses a portable travel scooter to protect his muscles from damage. For great deals on scooters, power wheelchairs and other mobility aids, visit http://www.spinlife.com or read Rodney’s fiction blog at http://www.lulu.com/rodneyrobbins.

The risk of having a fall and hurting ourselves increases with age. In fact, falls are responsible for approximately a third of all cases of accidental death and serious injury among people aged 65 and over. Furthermore, the likelihood of an 85-year-old person having a fall is five times that of a 65-year-old.

Risk factors for falling generally fall into two categories: a person’s physical environment, and state of health.

So what things should you look out for if you are concerned about your own risk of falling or indeed somebody else’s?

The Physical Environment

Around half of all falls in the home occur as a result of tripping over objects and falling on steps and stairs. Falls can also occur when a person changes position, for instance when getting up out of a chair or climbing out of bed.

Here is a checklist of simple things you can do around the home to help ensure a safe environment:

* Make sure all living areas are well lit, particularly stairs

* Replace worn rugs and carpets, and make sure there are no frayed edges

* Make sure all floor surfaces are non-slip

* Place an anti-slip mat in the bath and shower

* Don’t wear trailing clothes

* Avoid wearing poorly fitting shoes and slippers, and don’t wear high heels

* Ensure grab rails are fitted beside the bath, shower and toilet and that there is a handrail on the stairs.

* Install two-way light switches

* Don’t leave things lying around; put them away

It is also important to consider the outside areas of the home. The ground should be level, walkways should be clear and any garden tools should be tidied away.

Particular care needs to be taken in cold weather when paths can become slippery.

Health

Getting older and age-related changes go hand-in-hand. There is a loss of muscle strength, reactions become slower, eyesight isn’t what it used to be, balance might be affected and there may even be the occasional dizzy spells.

These changes, along with other medical conditions and prescription medicines (which often have side effects) can all increase the risk of having a fall.

An adequate diet becomes ever more important to help maintain health, vitality and strength. Missing meals and eating infrequently can be a frequent occurrence for an older person who feels too tired to cook. This can lead to nutritional problems such as anaemia.

It is particularly important that an older person gets enough calcium as this helps to maintain bone strength, and that they get enough vitamin D (the best way of getting this is exposure to the sun) as this helps the body to absorb calcium.

To help maintain good health:

* Eat three meals a day

* Eat a wide variety of fruits and vegetables

* Make sure the diet includes calcium-rich foods such as dairy products and green leafy vegetables, or take a supplement

* Ensure levels of vitamin D are maintained by spending time outdoors. If this is not possible eat eggs and oily fish, or take a supplement.

* Ensure the freezer and store cupboards are well stocked if the weather is too bad to shop

* Try to remain as active as possible to maintain muscle strength and balance

* Have regular eyesight checks. These can detect other health problems such as diabetes in addition to ensuring good sight

* See a chiropodist to make sure that good foot health is maintained

* Avoid mixing alcohol with medications

Unfortunately people do not always notice their reduced physical capabilities, and are not aware of the risks they face — that is, until they have a fall. Alerting people to potential dangers and implementing a few simple measures can help to reduce the likelihood they will have a fall.

Sharon Kirby is a freelance writer from West Sussex, England and specialises in writing about fitness and health. For more details of her articles, news and features visit her website http://www.healthwriter.co.uk

All caregiving is stressful. We help caregivers reduce the stress of caring for loved ones with dementia, but we can’t eliminate it. The two most common results of caregiver stress are increased illness (reduced resistance to disease) and depression.

A recent study done at McGill University in Montreal found that untreated depression can lead to dementia. In other words, in some situations you can catch dementia from your loved one.

Depression in caregivers is more common and long-lasting than in all other caregiver situations.

Scientists speculate that this is because, on average, dementia caregivers provide care for a much longer period of time than do any other caregivers.

Below are nine questions your physician might ask you if he suspected depression. You might have a depressed mood (not true depression) if you have even just one symptom, but if you have five or more symptoms you qualify for a diagnosis of major depression.

Do you have:

• A persistent sadness or general unhappiness
• Chronic fatigue or lack of energy
• A lack of interest in activities you used to enjoy
• Consistent irritability or consistently feel agitated
• A progressive change in your appetite or your weight
• A change (not caused by your loved one) in your normal sleep pattern
• Feelings that you are worthlessness or you feel excessive or inappropriate guilt
• Difficulty concentrating or feel you are not thinking clearly
• Any thoughts of ending it all or committing suicide

If you feel you have more than five of the above symptoms you might want to do a quick self test on your memory. As one physician once told me "If you can’t seem to keep track of your keys your probably just getting older, but if you can’t remember what keys are you may have dementia".

Here are some questions you can ask yourself to see where you fall on the memory scale. Do you have:

• Difficulty remembering things much more often than you used to
• Difficulty remembering how to do things you’ve done many times before
• Difficulty learning new things
• Experiences where you repeat phrases or stories in the same conversation
• Trouble making choices or handling money
• Difficulty keeping track of what happens each day

Caregivers who don’t get help to resolving depression may get dementia. If you answered "yes" to more than three of the above questions you may be experiencing abnormal memory loss. Consult your physician with these test scores and ask his opinion. Both depression and dementia can be reversed. Often they are symptoms of vitamin deficiency, lack of sleep, medication side effects, or simply stress. Your physician can help you sort them out.

Alfred Norwood is an expert in managing dementia behaviors, and the creator of Sound and Loving Care, which is devoted to helping you care for someone whose memory and thinking ability are deteriorating. You can find more of his articles at http://soundandlovingcare.com

Whether you are an unpaid family caregiver or a professional in-home health care provider, you are most likely willing to admit you have on occasion been near the breaking point. The demands placed on a caregiver can be all at once physically exhausting and emotionally overwhelming. Unrealistic expectations piled on you from case managers, agency supervisors, your client’s family or the client him or herself can lead to workplace fatigue. When you become aware of your own feelings of anger, depression, or unresolved job frustration, this can mean something more serious. Workplace burnout is a type of stress that is potentially dangerous. Here are ten tips that will help you to identify coping strategies to alleviate caregiver burnout.

Do not ignore your own physical symptoms. A nagging headache, backache or upset stomach could become debilitating if left unchecked.

Participate in a professional network. Newsletters, peer groups, chats and online forums can be great sources of information, as well as places to vent frustration.

Consult with medical professionals about burnout issues. While stress is normal, burnout can be dangerous both for you and those for whom you provide care.

Attend a support group to receive feedback and to learn coping skills. Others in your situation are often a wonderful resource for information, inspiration and strength.

Do not allow yourself to become isolated from your own life. You are not what you do for a living. Stay involved with your own activities and interests.

Find ways to share the focus of your responsibilities. Consult with family members or co-workers on rotating duties to keep your work fresh and interesting.

Establish "quiet time" each day for rest, reading, catching up on your email, or even yoga or meditation.

Get a weekly massage. This may seem frivolous; however, even a short neck and shoulder massage can relieve physical tension and be rejuvenating.

Assess how often you can help. Learn your limits. If you have trouble saying “no,” create a written contract for services upon which you and your client can agree. This contract can act as a safeguard against others who might be tempted to take advantage of you.

Evaluate your expertise. Stay current. Enhance your education. Seek instruction, training, and advice from the physician, nurses and home care agencies Involved in your client’s care.

Locate local resources for respite care, also called adult day care. This is a service that allows for a family member or care provider to get a break for a few hours during the day.

Finally, learn to identify the various ways in which stress affects you. Insomnia, irritability, recurring colds or other illnesses, negativity, hopelessness or feeling out of control can all be warning signs. These burnout signals can lead to a disassociation from your work, which can become the cause of accident or injury to yourself or your client. Take care of yourself, so that you are better able to be the source of strength and inspiration for your own family and friends, in addition to being better able to meet the needs of your client.

Copyright 2005. All rights reserved.

Laura Gillson is a speaker, author and educator specializing in disability awareness, advocacy, accessibility and assistive technology. For corporate, community or caregiver training, visit Eloquent Insights at http://www.eloquentinsights.com If you need help with in-home care, you’ll find it at In-Home Insights at http://www.inhomeinsights.com Finally, you’ll discover a site for sore eyes at Accessible Insights at http://www.accessibleinsights.com The author’s email address is lgillson@eloquentinsights.com

What will your life be like after you place your loved one in a long-term care facility?

Will you feel lonely, have caregiver guilt, be stressed out, or sad? More than likely!

One of the hardest things to overcome is the caregiver guilt. You will probably feel guilty because you are out having a nice time, while your loved one sits in a nursing home. You may feel like you should have or could have done more to keep them at home. You will also wish you had them back.

There is a wonderful book by William Bakkus, called "Telling Yourself the Truth." If caregiver guilt is your heavy burden, you should post these truths on the refrigerator or the bathroom mirror until you believe them. (It might take a while)

1. You did not cause this disease
2. Your loved one would not have wanted you to stop living
3. Being a caregiver was one of the most noble and wonderful things anyone can do for a loved one
4. You did the best you could under the most extreme care giving circumstances.

While it is obvious that you did not put your loved one in a nursing home only to abandoned them, on the outside world you still have several tough choices to make.

Are you going to live again? Or are you going to let caregiver guilt, stress, loneliness dictate how you will live your life?

It is important that you give yourself some time to adjust or to let all of those feelings out or grieve, just know that the goal is to begin living again.

At some point in the process, all of this becomes a choice. A choice to live again! ~ Dutchy

Renee "Dutchy" Reeves is an Elder Care Consultant with over 10 years of working with the elderly and their families. Her online advice column, "Ask Dutchy" provides practical ideas and advice for assisting the elderly with Alzheimer’s disease, Dementia, Parkinson’s, disability, and those needing long term care. See other articles by her at http://www.askdutchy.mycarelink.net